Your Questions; My Answers Part II

This post will only address questions posed by one reader. Said reader didn't ask a question until Part I of my question-answer time, but his/her comment hurt and disturbed me. While I'm sure I should not respond, I felt as though I would be remiss not to address his/her questions.

Anonymous asked: Do you ever think critically about anything? About why you might feel the need to diet when you're obviously not fat? Do you ever examine your childhood fantasies about "playing house" and realize they are a bit sexist? I think your heading tells a lot about you--trying to be a grown up "lady"--what about trying to be a woman?

- I think this question would best be answered in parts, so here it goes:

a) Yes, I do think critically. In fact, critical thinking and finding creative solutions are strengths of mine and are noted as such on my resume. I would be happy to send you a copy, so you can see for yourself.

b) If you read my answer to the fitness question again, you will see that I never said that I was on a "diet," in context, the use of the word "diet" denotes my eating patterns in general, not a specific "diet plan." In fact, I'm adamant about not trying to stick to a diet. My senior year of high school I was 15 lbs. heavier than I am now. In a desperate effort to lose weight I abused laxatives for several months and damaged my digestive system for many months after that, and, of course, lost no weight. As many of you know, I spent my first semester of college at Virginia Tech, and I was utterly miserable. I became a stress non-eater and became extremely controlling of what I ate. For much of the duration of that semester I limited myself to consuming only 600 calories a day. Those 15 lbs. quickly fell off, but my metabolism is still feeling the repercussions of that irresponsible decision. I have maintained the weight loss, but only after a very long battle with myself in which I became realistic about my body, my diet (my eating patterns in general) and my weight. I can proudly say now, that I have an appreciation with my body, not a competition. Of course, there will be always be parts that I wish were smaller, firmer, stronger, etc, but now I eat and workout for my health and the endorphins it gives me, not to try and attain something impossible or unnatural for me. Diets are not part of that equation and never will be again.

c) Clearly I do not need to examine my reasons for playing House since you answered that one for me. I am unclear about why House is sexist, though. As a communication major, I spent the three and a half years of my college career exploring gender roles, role playing games, and gender development. I know that House is a gender-developing-role- playing game. I am not bothered in the least by that. I have and always will take my gender role from Scripture, particularly from Ephesians, which states, "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord." I believe that women are to serve their husbands as serving the Lord. Women are the only sex that can bear children, therefore, I have every intention of doing so. Women are to create households which uphold the Lord and serve His commands. In playing House, I was simply acting out a future that I fully intend to have... caretaking, nurturing and providing. Where is the sexism in that? If you read the rest of my answer, you will also see my intention to continue working. Working fulfills a creative outlet for me (much like this blog does), and if I am blessed to be able to continue that while also raising and providing for a God-fearing family, I will absolutely do that. I was raised in a family that stuck very closely to traditional gender roles - my mother was a stay-at-home mother raising 3 children while my father worked full-time. I will also defend maintaining those conventional feminine roles and remain unapologetic that I have a love of cooking, baking, cleaning, decorating and creating a home.

d) I also agree that my header tells a lot about me. I am joyful. I hope that I have created a blog that reflects my joy in living. As for the semantics of using the word "lady" vs. "woman," I guess to satisfy you, I will need to pull out my internal dictionary. To me, a woman is a fully-grown female. At 22, I am a woman; however, in many ways I also feel like a young girl trying to find my way in each new stage of my life. This blog candidly outlines my trials and adventures in doing so. To me, a lady is a woman who exudes grace, elegance, selflessness, determination, perseverance, wisdom, love, Christlike principles, maturity, loyalty and integrity. Those characteristics are ones that I am striving to possess, cultivate and nurture in myself. Again I turn to scripture and find the lady described in Proverbs 31, and I yearn to seek the Lord and allow Him to work in my heart and my life and create in me a heart after His own. I am already a woman, but that is what I mean by trying to be a "lady".

e) I will never, ever portray myself through this blog as someone that I'm not. I will never pretend to be greater than I am or someone different than who I was born. I will always write openly, candidly and honestly. If you disagree with the things that I write or the personality characteristics that I possess, I do not and will not apologize, but I will respectfully remind you that you do not have to read this. I am so thankful for the relationships that I have formed in the 2 months that I have been writing, and I thank you all for your encouragement and comments.