I was hoping that the dawn of a new month would bring back my spark, but considering that it's the third day of the month and only my first post, that clearly hasn't been the case. Part of that has been dealing with the passing of my Aunt Adrienne. I just didn't feel right filling post after post with "rules" or silly sightings at the gym during her struggle. She was laid to rest yesterday afternoon, and I know that she's in peace in Heaven right now.
Now that I'm back in the game, it's only appropriate to share the guilt trip I'm taken on every few months. The culprit? The GROOMER. I take Sadie to have her split ends de-splitted, and her tresses refreshed every few months or so, and while she loves getting beautified, her mom hates it. Yep, I know that each trip through that bell-bedecked door will leave me feeling like a worthless and negligent pet owner.
Sadiekins is difficult to keep brushed, and, heck, sometimes I just don't do it. On the list of must-do's each day, "Brush the dog" often gets pushed somewhere deep into the "Ummm, riiiight, like that's going to happen" pile. ("Feed the dog;" "Cuddle the dog;" "Play with the dog;" and "Keep the dog alive," always stay atop the list, lest you animal activists come a-knocking.) But, without fail, I am given the major stink eye each time we enter the grooming salon as the groomer casts a wary eye across my poor pooch.
Even when she's just a touch shaggy, I am immediately reprimanded for the "SEVERE MATTING" covering her sweet, wiggly bod and lectured that cocker spaniels need to be groomed every 3-4 weeks. Um, newsflash for you, Groomer Bernice, that is NOT going to happen. For one thing, I don't get my own mane tamed nearly that often, and while my coif totals $22 per trip to maintain, Miz Sadiebugs rings up for about $55. Now, I know you don't have access to my bank accounts, but lemme just go ahead and let you know that I took the liberty of calling Dave Ramsey to ask permission to spend $55 per month on superficial pet expenses, and he replied with a heartfelt, "Hell to the nah." And I agree. Therefore, sweetums, let's just go ahead and get one thing straight, I will not bring Sadie to visit you any more often than I am currently. You will lay off punching one-way tickets to GuiltTown, and we will agree to be friends - as dander-covered as you may be.