Earlier this week while in the shower following an intense hot yoga class, while the hubbers was working a very late night, I noticed an itchy bump on my lower right buttocks. Naturally I became fixated on it, and naturally it was in a locale that I could only scope out by feel rather than sight. Reverting to a decidedly six year old mindset, I decided that the only way to remedy the situation was by applying a Band-aid. The only way to apply a Band-aid the adult way is to apply Neosporin first, so I worked to pop a hip and shoulder out of socket in order to shmear my rump in the ointment to heal my ailment. The only Band-aids I could lay my hands on at the moment were the Batman ones I'd gotten for the fella after a work mishap with a hot pan and sharp knife, but I assumed they'd be okay. As I felt my way. cautiously, to the work in the rear, I contorted my body in such a way that I lost my footing and completely wiped out, pulling my lady bits and bruising both my behind cheeks and pride in the process. Gingerly I got up and slapped on a criss-cross of Batman and Robin and proceeded to send this text to my sister and doting husband...
"Just tried to bandage my own @$$ and fell down. Now I have a massive bruise in addition to the first ailment."
My husband replied, "Sigh." Much later when he returned home he would remember to make sure I was all right (luckily for him, I was). The next day as I was changing he also caught sight of the Batman and Batmobile bandage cross proudly displayed on my tush and laughed himself silly.
My sister replied, "Hahahahahahaha."
Today I am very thankful to the people in my life who show so much care and concern to my maladies. Thanks, guys, my fanny and I love you too. And yes, the Neosporin worked, thank you very much. Not that anyone was asking.