Wednesday, November 4, 2009

A Note From My Sister

Little Sister has agreed to contribute to this little blog with a post that is all her own... sarcastic, hilarious and witty. Inspired by the upcoming holiday season and the plight of blended families all across the country, Sis articulates in her ever-so-dry way that awkward family situations aren't strictly limited to step-parent interactions.

Without further ado, please enjoy my sister's spin on step-grandparents.

After waking up from a dream Monday night in which I was Cinderella (I was a Disney princess, naturally), I was reminded of the "special" dynamic in our family that has been created due to the addition of step-grandparents. Although, we are extremely blessed that Little Mama and Daddy have been happily married for 28 years, our grandparents divorced when I was 2. Several years later, Grandmother found a new husband for my precious Daddy to call his old man (just kidding about this part), we'll refer to him as Mr. Dyke (yes, I'm serious) and Papaw found a new squeeze as well, June (affectionately known in our household as June Bug).

After Grandmother formally became a Dyke (a favorite joke between me and Big Sis)... without sending us a wedding invitation, I'll have you know (can you say shotgun wedding?), the first tricky step-grandparent hurdle we tried to get over was how to address our new step-grandfather, seeing as no one felt comfortable calling him Papa, Papaw, Pops, etc. Although Grandmother insisted we call him by his first name, my dear, sweet Big Sis began to call him Mr. Dyke. As for June Bug, it was never really decided what to call her to her face. Since she entered the family, we don't really address her by name at all. In fact, my favorite little June Bug has never even visited our house with Papaw. While this is probably due to the fact that she doesn't want to lug her oxygen tank (cough, cough.. emphysema) over the mountains from Tennessee, it is by no means a reflection of how much she wants to "get to know" us. In fact, while Big Sis and I were in Knoxville for the UT/UGA game staying with Juniper and "her man"--yes, she referred to my Papaw as "her man"-- she made it very clear to us that she wanted to get closer with "the girls" and that we were welcome to stay any time. Yes, that is very nice of you, thanks. But no, I am not going to come visit Papaw and paint nails and have pillow talk with you, step-grandmother.

In contrast, step-grandfather Mr. Dyke has more than made it known that he will always like the Dyke children and grandchildren better than my precious family. In fact, when it came time for my wonderful Sis to graduate from college, Grandmother and Mr. Step-Grandfather made the trip to come. What an inconvenience it must have been for Mr. Dyke, because at the post-graduation lunch, he told my Sis that he had been to several graduations already and was frankly too tired from them to want to be there. I'm sorry, what?! It is perfectly feasible that this could've been one of his many...attempted jokes. However, it seems to me that trying to balance a "blended family" beginning in your 70's is just too tough a task for those too faint of heart.

Frankly, I'm still anxiously awaiting the day when I can meet my new step-aunts, uncles, and cousins, and I know Daddy can't wait to play ball on the holidays with his new step-siblings...


Samma said...

That is just rude! I am confused about hte shotgun wedding aspect though- your grandmother was pregnant? Regardless, Mr. Dyke sounds like a piece of work.

Rachel H. said...

Too funny...I agree that it's a bit much to ask when you are in your 70's. :)

Anonymous said...

Too funny! I have a "steps" on both sides of my family and so does my husband. There's always something funny to talk about.